I'm so fortunate to have many friendships that are each valuable in their own way; I can't possibly focus on just one. Here's a list of my top friendships over the years “in order of their appearance”:
Lynn--my first childhood "best friend." When I was 6 years old, we moved away from my grandparents' apple farm in Novi to the suburbs of Farmington. It was a big change for me because we were pretty isolated on the farm, where I had only my brother and cousins as playmates. Lynn lived across the street from our new house and befriended me immediately. We played school, paper dolls, and wrote stories together for hours upon hours. She introduced me to the worlds of roller skating and bike riding. It was a very sad day when she moved away when I was 10 years old. Lynn was extremely instrumental in teaching me the meaning of friendship.
Joy--I first met Joy when she was 3 and I was 6. Her family lived next door, and the 3-year difference seemed extreme when we were younger but became insignificant as we grew up. Her family was very active outdoors and they had a membership at a local lake. Some of my favorite childhood memories involve going to the lake with her family. I honed my water skiing skills behind their big wood Chris-Craft boat. Later they moved to a lake in Fenton and I spent many enjoyable weekends there; I got my first major sunburn when I fell asleep on their raft on the lake. In our married years, we’ve spent several carefree houseboating vacations together. Joy and her family taught me the value and fun of living an active outdoor life.
Teri--Teri and her family lived on the other side of Joy. Her mother abandoned her when she was a baby and her father died when we were 9 years old, leaving her and her siblings at the mercy of her stepmother. I was afraid of the stepmother and well aware of the emotional abuse that went on in the household, but I didn't realize there was also physical abuse until years later. She hid the secret well. Teri and I walked home from school every day; but I rarely saw her afterwards, when she entered her house of horrors. At 17, she moved into her own apartment and put herself through college at the U of M. To this day, Teri is undergoing dental work, foot surgery, and counseling due to the abuse. Teri has kept in contact with her stepmother and has somehow let go of most of the anger and resentment. She's an amazing example of independence, resilience, and forgiveness.
Sue--By luck of the draw, Sue became my suitemate during my sophomore year at MSU, and then my roommate/apartment-mate during my junior and senior years. We've been the best of friends ever since, moving to California together after college. My high school and the community where I lived were full of hoity-toity types (don't you love that word?) who were generally narrow-minded and unaccepting. When I met Sue, she was the exact opposite of those things and a very much needed breath of fresh air. She's an open-minded friend who shares all aspects of her life with me and reciprocates by listening to me without judgment. She's a fun-loving individual who delights in exploring new activities and ideas. She's the person who introduced me to the worlds of scrapbooking, cycling, and who knows what else over the years. I'm extremely blessed to have her in my life and I know that we’ll always be there for each other.
Teresa et al from Rocky Mountain Park--I've always loved the outdoors and when I worked in Colorado for two summers, I found a group of adventurous friends who had similar interests and have stuck with me through the years. We spent many happy hours hiking and camping together, at one point successfully climbing a 14,000-foot mountain. Teresa is my "green" friend and I've become much more conscious about environmental issues due to her influence. With her as my role model, I recently quit buying the plastic water bottles and purchased a Brita filter and nalgene bottles in my own small attempt to improve the environment. My life wouldn't be nearly as fulfilling without my outdoor friends.
Steve D.--Steve and I were co-workers at Wells Fargo, where I worked on and off for almost 15 years. Our relationship was always strictly platonic, but I could unfailingly count on his loyalty. His companionship and support were invaluable to me when I had a bad break-up with a long-term boyfriend. He eventually rented an apartment in Hawthorne, CA which was literally in my backyard at the time, so we became close neighbors. His quirky personality always kept me entertained and amused, and one of my fondest memories is coming home for lunch and watching Mr. Ed on TV with him. Another show we watched together was Cheers; he did a great impression of Norm. Steve is a music lover with a vast knowledge of a wide variety of music. Traditionally, I attended the Playboy Jazz Festival every summer at the Hollywood Bowl, and the time he and I went together was educational as well as enjoyable.
Janet--Janet was my next door neighbor when we lived in the smaller house in Lake Elsinore. Despite having MS, she started a Welcome Wagon business in our neighborhood of newly constructed homes. I watched through the years as she gradually lost her sense of balance and her ability to walk. Through it all, she was upbeat and cheerful. She spent hours on her front porch reading to my daughter Michelle when she was a little girl. She and her husband moved away from CA before we did, but we still keep in touch. She can no longer speak or hold her head up, but still she perseveres. Her husband tells me that my Christmas letters are one of the highlights of the season for her. I'll always admire Janet's humility and grace in the face of a devastating disease.
Lynn--I must have a special bond with females named Lynn! This Lynn was my next-door neighbor after we moved up the street to the big house in Lake Elsinore. (Yes, we lived in two different houses on the same street.) Because our husbands both worked nights and we each had two children around the same ages, we “hung out” together often. We spent hours on the phone despite the fact that we were in houses right next to each other. We’d clean our houses while talking on the phone. Lynn has a great sense of humor and can imitate different accents extremely well. Her husband plays in a band and she sings, so we spent many fun evenings out with them. Our husbands began calling us Lucy and Ethel. The special thing about Lynn is that she usually approaches life with wild abandon, or as the saying goes, she “dances as if nobody’s watching.” When life gets too dull, serious, or depressing, Lynn is a great friend to have around.
Wendy—Every woman needs a friend who will honestly tell her what hairstyle looks best on her, give her makeup tips, advise her about what clothing styles to adopt and what to stay away from. You get my drift. Wendy is that friend and my own personal stylist. I met her 11 years ago when I started my present job, and I had just left a very conservative job working for the school system. She saved me from my “schlumpy” stage. (You might have eventually caught me on “What Not to Wear” if it weren’t for Wendy.) She’s also a crafts person/decorator extraordinaire. She helped me immeasurably with planning for my daughter Michelle’s wedding. Wendy introduced me to her long-time friend Kim, an ex-hippie and my hairdresser who I love. Every woman should have a Wendy in her life.
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