I thnk when this set of 10 questions is finished, I need to pin them up on the refrigerator--for both Rich's benefit and mine!
In the heat of the moment, the courtesy of listening without interrupting gets completely thrown out the window for us. When we disagree, we're each guilty of either attempting to drown out the other person or getting in the last word. This is aggravated by the fact that he naturally has a very loud, deep voice. It takes a conscious awareness for me to take a breath and let Rich finish what he's saying before stating my own feelings. It also takes a conscious effort to really HEAR what he's saying rather than busily planning my own response.
When Rich doesn't extend me the same courtesy in return, the anger rises and the cycle of interrupting starts all over again because I feel I haven't had my say. I've actually walked away in frustration at this point. I've also written him a letter on a couple of occasions when I felt there was no other way to state my feelings without interruption.
Curiously, I don't act this way during disagreements with anyone else other than my immediate family members (husband and on rare occasions, daughters). I'm much more polite to friends, acquaintances, and even strangers. I guess that's human nature. But shouldn't it be just the opposite? Shouldn't we treat the people we love the most with the utmost courtesy and respect?
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